Secretary of Defense Humiliated as US Credit Card Rejected

ST. LOUIS — An attempt to build international goodwill backfired horribly for Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld Monday, when he was unable to pick up the tab for Australian Defense Minister Sen. Robert Hill’s order of 11 Apache AH-64 helicopters using the U.S.’s credit card.

“It was extraordinarily embarrassing for poor Donald,” said Hill, who visited the Boeing production facility with Rumsfeld and Joint Chief of Staff Richard Myers. “He’d been going on for the entire tour about how America was stronger than it had ever been, and then that happened. He turned red as a beet.”

The credit card, a Fort Knox Executive Club Visa granted to the U.S. during the Clinton Administration, had an assigned $300 million credit line. When the country accrued a balance approaching the limit in 1995, the credit-card company awarded the U.S. additional credit. According to a Visa representative who spoke on the condition of anonymity, the company granted extensions 14 times since then, but as of Monday, the card had never been rejected outright.

Where else, but from the pages of The Onion?

1 Comment

  1. Amazing. I took it for real until I saw the attribution.

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